Incline your ear to wisdom

What are the odds of a simple guy like me answering the last question on Jeopardy while Ken Jennings, a fellow Utahn getting it wrong?  What’s odd about that you may ask?  Well, Ken Jennings as many of you know is a long time champion on Jeopardy, who won more than $2 million dollars already!  Also, the question or should I say the answer, was relatively easy: “This firm’s 70,000 seasonal employees only works for 4 months of the year” (or something like that).  The correct answer, or should I say question (dang, this show is messing me up!):  What is H & R Block?  His opponent got the correct response.  His answer?  (or question, whatever) What is FedEx? :(

It gets weirder folks............

The same night we shopped at Walmart and we bought 8 items.  Our bill....exactly $20.00 dollars!  Here’s the breakdown:

GV Apple juice    & nbsp;   &n bsp;   &nb sp;   &nbs p;   $1.97

Bounty paper towels    & nbsp;   &n bsp;  $3.42

3 Litter Orange soda    & nbsp;   &n bsp;  $0.94

Vitamin D Milk        & nbsp;   &n bsp;   &nb sp;   $2.49

Maruchan Instant Noodles   $0.28

Maruchan Instant Noodles   $0.28

Pot of Gold Box of Choco   $6.88

Oreo    & nbsp;   &n bsp;   &nb sp;   &nbs p;     ;         & nbsp;    $2.50

Subtotal    & nbsp;   &n bsp;   &nb sp;   &nbs p;     ;        $18.76

Tax 6.6%    & nbsp;   &n bsp;   &nb sp;   &nbs p;     ;        $1.24

    & nbsp;   &n bsp;   &nb sp;   &nbs p;     ;         & nbsp;   &n bsp;   &nb sp;  ---------

Ka-ching!!!    & nbsp;   &n bsp;      & nbsp;   &n bsp;   $20.00

Gee, what next?  Aliens visiting?  Charlize Theron asking me for a date? 

Cineast n., (variant: cineaste) Etymology: French cinéaste, from ciné + -aste (as in enthousiaste enthusiast): a devotee of motion pictures.

    & nbsp;   &n bsp;   &nb sp;   &nbs p;      & nbsp;   &n bsp; Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary

My wife came to me yesterday sniffing “You made me cry”.  “What did I do?” I asked thinking she discovered my hidden pictures of Nicole Kidman or she saw the balance on our bank account.  “I just read you’re blog”.  “Whew” I thought.  I’m glad you were touched by it honey, but let me make it up to you.  Hope this would at least make you smile.  The filmography of your favorite actor, Kevin Spacey (source: imdb.com).  Beside every film I added my honest to goodness, extremely subjective rating.  One star mean watch it only if your being held at gunpoint.  Two stars mean watch it only if you got the hots for Mr. Spacey regardless of the quality of the film.  Three means rent the dvd.  Four means buy the dvd.  Five means buy 2 copies of the dvd and give one to a friend.  N/A means I haven’t watched it yet (maybe you, dear reader can help me out on these ones).

Edison (2005) (post-production)  (N/A)
Beyond the Sea (2004)...Bobby Darin (N/A)
Life of David Gale, The (2003)...David Gale (***)
United States of Leland, The (2003)...Albert T. Fitzgerald (***)
Tower of Babble, The (2002)...Narrator (N/A)
Shipping News, The (2001)... Quoyle (****)
K-PAX (2001)... Prot/Robert Porter (****)
Pay It Forward (2000)...Eugene Simonet (*****)
Ordinary Decent Criminal (2000)...Michael Lynch (N/A)
It's Tough to Be a Bug (1999)(voice)...Hopper (N/A)
Big Kahuna, The (1999)...Larry Mann (N/A)
American Beauty (1999)...Lester Burnham (****)
Bug's Life, A (1998) (voice)... Hopper (****)
Hurlyburly (1998)...Mickey (**)
Negotiator, The (1998)... Lt. Chris Sabian (*****)
Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil (1997)...
   James 'Jim' Williams (****)
L.A. Confidential (1997)...Sgt. Jack Vincennes (***)
Time to Kill, A (1996)...D.A. Rufus Buckley (*****)
Se7en (1995)...John Doe (****)
Usual Suspects, The (1995)...Roger 'Verbal' Kint (*****) 
Outbreak (1995)...Maj. Casey Schuler (****)
Swimming with Sharks (1994)...Buddy Ackerman (N/A)
     ... aka Boss, The (1994/II) 
     ... aka Buddy Factor, The (1994) 
Doomsday Gun (1994) (TV)...Jim Price (N/A)

Ref, The (1994)...Lloyd Chasseur (N/A)
     ... aka Hostile Hostages (1994) 
Iron Will (1994)...Harry Kingsley (N/A)
Consenting Adults (1992)...Eddy Otis (N/A)
Glengarry Glen Ross (1992)...John Williamson (***) 
Darrow (1991) (TV)...Clarence Darrow (N/A)
When You Remember Me (1990) (TV)...Wade (N/A) 
Henry & June (1990)...Richard Osborn (N/A)
Show of Force, A (1990)...Frank Curtin (N/A)

    & nbsp;   Although English is just my second language, I’ve always loved to play Scrabble.   My dad and mom taught me the game when I was about 13 years old and I have lots of fond memories of the three of us playing.  First I was just a spectator, watching these two well read people battle it out on the board.  Then when I felt confident enough, I asked them if I could join in.   They were kind enough to let me play but I got clobbered, my score wasn’t even close to their scores.  But I did not get discouraged.  This just motivated me to study words by reading our dictionary (Our dictionary back then was a two-volume Reader's Digest Encyclopedic Dictionary.  It had lots of pictures and illustrations, so it was more readable than the usual dictionaries).  As an added motivation, they told me that they would double my allowance for the next day every time I win (we played after dinner).  Now this was no easy task, for my mom was an English high school teacher and my dad was a History college professor.  These people knew some words that I haven't even heard before.  But soon enough I learned high scoring words and high scoring plays.  I learned how to use those premium squares in the board (double-word-score, triple-word-score).  After a year, I was playing bingos (using all 7 tiles in your rack) and getting 50-point bonuses on my plays.  One day I finally beat them! I couldn't believe it.  I finally beat two of the smartest people I have ever known (this remains true up to this day).  I remember it was a close margin so we had to do a recount (they couldn't believe it either I guess).  The scores stood and they handed me my doubled allowance.  I couldn't sleep that night.  Must have been the adrenaline still running through me.

    & nbsp;   Let’s fast-forward 10 years.  I got hired by a US computer consulting firm and I moved here to Utah.  You could just imagine my excitement when I chanced upon a newspaper article about a Scrabble club that meets every Wednesdays.   I also learned about the National Scrabble Association (from the same article), which has over 10,000 members and conducts Scrabble tournaments all over North America!   I quickly joined both organizations.   The first time I attended club, they matched me against another beginner.   I won the game so I thought,  “I could match up against any of these guys”.  But my bloated confidence was quickly shattered when I played against two expert players for my next two games.  I couldn’t remember the actual scores. But I guess I didn’t really want to remember those beatings.     What I actually remember is that on that night, I decided to be as good as those guys.

    & nbsp;   On October of 1998, I joined my first Scrabble tournament in Scottsdale, Arizona.  I won 8 out of 13 games against other novice players.  I didn’t win any cash prize but I got my first official rating: 839.  I’m now an official competitive Scrabble player.  On May 1999, I traveled to Seattle, Washington to compete in my second tournament.  This time I placed third in a division of 14 players!  I won $120 and my rating increased to 1002.  I have competed in eight mores tournaments since then, including the Nationals, which was held in New Orleans last August.  Two weeks ago, we went to Las Vegas and I competed in my 10th tournament.  I won a not too shabby $500 for winning 11 out of 16 games in Division 2.

    & nbsp;   My quest to master this game has taken me to an exciting and quite memorable journey.  You see the benefits of this game goes beyond the obvious vocabulary buildup.  It has also taught me the value of discipline and hard work during my preparations for a tournament.  I learned how to focus and think strategically during those intense and nerve-wracking games. Along the way I have also met many kind and gracious people, who have taught me to be humble in both victory and defeat.  These are the people that I am now proud to call my extended Scrabble family.  Now let’s go back to my original Scrabble family.

    & nbsp;   Last January my wife, my daughter and I visited our families in the Philippines.  Among the goodies that I brought home for my dad and mom was a deluxe Scrabble set and an OSPD (Official Scrabble Players Dictionary).  My mom and dad were really excited to play in a board that rotates without the tiles slipping from their squares! (It has raised grids to hold the tiles in place).  They were also thrilled to learn new words from me and the dictionary (we played open dictionary).  We played every day, under the shade of a mango tree in front of our house.  We laughed and teased each other as we played words after words.  Just like old times.  I was holding back tears when I left them and my two sisters after a month and a half of a joyous vacation.  Little did I know that more tears were coming. 

    & nbsp;   Just three months after that I had to come back to the Philippines.  My dad suddenly died from an aortic aneurysm.  During the funeral and after my dad’s burial, my mom and I tried to overcome the grief by playing Scrabble.  We were mourning not only for losing a husband and a dad.  She also lost a Scrabble partner.  I lost a Scrabble mentor.  We played with my sisters and my aunts.  We played during the day.  We played during the night.  We played to forget him.  We played to remember him.

    & nbsp;   A week ago I received an email from my sister informing me that they rushed my mom to the hospital.  She suffered another stroke.  This has been her fourth stroke.  Or was it her fifth?  I lost count already.  As I’m writing this she is still at the hospital fighting this debilitating disease.  As I continue to pray for her, I also continue to study my word lists.  I will continue to play this game with my computer and with my club mates.  Against other competitive players during tournaments.  This is not just a game to me.  

    & nbsp;   For every time I play this game I remember my father’s courage.  Every time I play this game I remember my mother’s generosity.  Every time I play this game I hear their laughter, I feel their love.  My mom may be thousands of miles away from me and my dad is even farther.  But I feel close to them every time I play a Scrabble game.  A game that connects the three of us.

Warning:  This post is made in the spirit of fun and not to insult other people.  If you get easily offended, then I suggest that you skip this post.  I'm an Asian driving a compact car, by the way :)

Have you ever come across those gas pumps with smart terminals?  The ones that ask you if you want a carwash?  Then if you answer yes, it will make you choose between the most expensive carwash and the next-to-most-expensive one?  (It doesn’t give you the option to choose the least expensive kind.  Pretty clever eh?)  How about the ones that reminds you to buy a large Slurpee or a Chevron buggy of your favorite color?  Or the ones where you can decline a receipt, in order for them to save on paper and ink?  Pretty smart eh?  Well those are nothing compared to the gas station that I’m thinking about.

When you pull up to a pump, it is smart enough to determine what kind of car you are driving.

If you’re driving a hybrid, red lights will go off.  A booming voice will come on:  “Red Alert!!!!  Red Alert!!!!  Self-righteous environmental elitist in the vicinity!   Red Alert!!!  Then if you are not fast enough to leave, spikes will appear to flatten all your tires.

If you are driving a compact car, no lights will go off.  But a mocking voice will come on for everyone within a mile to hear:  “Your either Asian, a student, a short guy or just short of cash.  Get a bigger car and get a life!!!  You will be charged a $20 surcharge that will go directly to the Republican Party.”

If you are driving a midsize or full size sedan, and you made the mistake of taking your 30-year-old son with you.  A camera will appear and scan the face of your son.  After a minute or two, an authoritative voice will come on:  “According to our database, you are John Lowlife.  After wasting 7 years of your life in college, you moved back to your parents place and you have never been employed.  Get a job, your own apartment and your own car you useless #$@%^&! (insert your favorite expletive here)”.

If you are driving a truck or an SUV, a celebratory voice will come on:  “Welcome friend!  Please see cashier for your free carwash and a map of your favorite road trip destinations”.

Now here’s the sweet part, if you’re driving a Hummer:  A voice will come on “Welcome your majesty!  Please enter the convenience store and see one of our massage therapists on standby to give you your complementary 30-minute massage.  After that, please see the manager and he will hand you an autographed poster of Arnold Schwarzenegger!”.

Now if I can only think of a cool name for the station.  Any suggestions?

I probably committed a Thanksgiving no-no tonight.  I didn’t eat any turkey!  Before you pick up some stones and punish me, please hear me out.  I just didn’t have enough room for it.  Blame it on my brother-in-law.  No, actually blame it on his good cooking.  He cooked both turkey and Cornish hens but after eating a whole of the latter, some mashed potatoes and some cheese macaroni, I was just too full to eat anything else.

Me:  Man, I’m feeling insecure around you cause you can cook and I can’t.  (Said this right after we arrived to complement him.  He cooked the whole dinner.) 

Him:    Don’t sweat it.  You don’t actually need to know how to cook, cause you have slaves to do it for you biatch!

Hope everybody had a great Thanksgiving.

I’ve lived here in the US since 1995, but I still use words or phrases that confuses Americans.

The first word you need to know.

CR.    It stands for comfort room, that’s what we call restrooms in the Philippines.  I remember one winter I was shopping groceries (I was single then) and I had to go.  I asked one of their cashiers “Where’s your CR?”  “What’s CR?” she asked back.  “Comfort Room.” I said, trying to hide the urgency of my question.  “Huh???” her face tells me she doesn’t have a clue what I’m talking about.  This time I think everybody around us senses that I was holding something back.  I thought “shoot, shoot, what am I gonna do?  Where’s my mommy, I need to wee wee!”  Finally I said, “the place where you pee, where is it?”  “Oh, the restroom.  It’s over there on your left!”  I ran to the door and gave my bladder its much needed relief (Or comfort.  Ahem, I still like our name for it).

Maria Sharapova wears them.

Rubber Shoes.  That’s what we call sneakers or tennis shoes.  This was actually discovered by my sister-in-law.  One day she asked her American husband if he wants her to wash his “rubber shoes”.  When he found out she was referring to his sneakers, he wasn’t able to hold himself and burst out laughing.  It’s a good thing my sister-in-law has better self control.  Or else he would have been hit with a pair of dirty rubber shoes.

You open a door, and then you close it.

This one both me and my sister-in-law (and I suspect most Filipinos not born here) are guilty.  We say open the lights instead of  “turn on the lights”.  My brother-in-law goes nuts whenever he hears his wife say this.  It’s really amusing to watch him roll his eyes while turning off the kitchen lights after she reminds him to “close them”.  Oh before I forget my dear readers, when you’re done reading this and before you sleep, don’t forget to close your computers.

    & nbsp;   Some of you may think this is corny.  But tonight's an emotional night for me and other Jazz fans when we pay tribute to John Stockton and retire his jersey at the Delta Center.  

    & nbsp;  This is a guy who gave his all to do his job.  He remained humble despite the fame he achieved.  I won't  describe him further for I know I wouldn't do justice for the guy's accomplishments.  But I think it's safe to say that he's not only the pride of Jazz fans, he's also the pride of the NBA.

Please check the slideshows I added on the right panel of my blog.

Many thanks to my tBlog friend Fotocali (see the link to his blog on the left panel) for teaching me how to create and rename slideshows.

Enjoy.

messiah

  • noun 1 (the Messiah) the promised liberator of the Jewish nation prophesied in the Hebrew Bible. 2 (the Messiah) Jesus regarded by Christians as the Messiah of these prophecies. 3 a leader or saviour.

—    & nbsp; ORIGIN Hebrew, ‘anointed’

Compact Oxford Dictionary

Could You Be Messiah

Music by:  Gary Valenciano
Lyrics by:  Freddie Santos

Could You be Healer
To a heart that’s been wounded
In a battle that’s never seen?
Could You be Teacher
To a mind of confusion
Tell me what does it all mean?

Are You Deliverer of an imprisoned feeling in chains?
Can You set my spirit free?
And just one more question
Allow me this question
Could You be Messiah to me?

Could You be Father?
To a soul that’s been abandoned
By a world too busy to hear
Could You be Friend
To a helpless survivor?
Can You take away my fear?

I’ve heard them all sharing
This newfound conviction in them
Are You all that they make You to be?
And just one more question
Could You be Messiah to me?

Now I’ve been looking for someone like You
And I’m so tired, so tired
I’ve read every book, and I’ve sung every song
My mind maybe right, but my heart feels so wrong
Just how much further can my life go along
Which way do the roads lead, where do I belong?

Would You be Keeper of my most unknown secrets?
Provider of all that I need?
Would You be Brother?
The One who knows better
Would You now stand in the lead

When all this is over
All the thunder and lightning
In the daylight, just what will I see?
The answer to my questions
To all of my questions
Would You be Messiah
Could You be
Please, be Messiah to me........ 

oxymoron n. figure of speech in which apparently contradictory terms appear in conjunction [Greek = pointedly foolish, from oxus sharp, moros dull]

    & nbsp;   &n bsp;   &nb sp;   &nbs p;     ;       & nbsp;   &n bsp;   &nb sp;   &nbs p;     ;       & nbsp;   &n bsp;   &nb sp;   The Pocket Oxford Dictionary
    & nbsp;   &n bsp;   &nb sp;   &nbs p;     ;       & nbsp;   &n bsp;   &nb sp;   &nbs p;     ;       & nbsp;   &n bsp;   &nb sp;   
    examples:  deafening silence,
    & nbsp;   &n bsp;   &nb sp;   &nbs p;     ;       smart gamblers

I have read numerous books about gambling and they all give advice on how to win in a casino.  They tell you how to choose the games that you will likely win (blackjack, craps, baccarat) and the ones that you want to avoid (slot machines, Pai Gow poker and keno).  They also tell you how to play the “good” games the right way, like when to double down on blackjack or not to make a “Field” bet in craps.  All these have inspired me to write my own book about gambling.   Its title will be “A Father’s Advice to his Daughter about Gambling”.  It will be in the Guinness’ Book of World Records as the shortest book in the world.  It will contain one page with one word on it:  DON’T  (and for the smart alecks out there, I know its two words conjugated, so don’t even think about commenting on that). 

I intend to publish it myself for although I have the guts to actually submit the manuscript to a publisher, I also know that they will just laugh me out of their offices.  Anyway, I will just produce about 10 copies and give one to my daughter (of course) and to friends and family.  If they ask me about it I will tell them about the countless gambler horror stories that I know, including my own.  You see I already tried all of the games I’ve listed above, including poker (Texas Hold 'em) and sports betting.  I can tell you right now, the odds of becoming rich from gambling are about the same as the odds of becoming rich from scanning coins in a beach.

     To learn from your own mistakes is smart, to learn from others' mistakes is wise.
    & nbsp;   &n bsp;   &nb sp;   &nbs p;     ;         & nbsp;   &n bsp;   &nb sp;   &nbs p;     ;    Author unknown

Dear fellow bloggers,

    & nbsp;   I’m one of those people who love to read other people’s blog.  If you don’t believe me, just ask my tBlog friends.  I’m sure some of them are already suspecting me of exhibiting stalker behavior whenever they see me visiting their blog twice or even thrice a day (Don’t worry my friends, I’m just catching up on your previous blogs).  Anyway my request is this, would you please make your blogs easy to read?  Would you make your fonts a little larger?  Would you make my aging eyes last a little longer? Please.

Thank you,

Your avid reader

10.  I like science, but I don’t believe in evolution.

  9.  I hate math, but I admire mathematicians.

  8.  I love kids, but I don’t want a big family (2 kids at the most).

  7.  I look Mexican, but I don’t speak Spanish.

  6.  I’m just 5’6”, but I fancy Nicole Kidman, Charlize Theron, and Maria Sharapova.

  5.  I work for a credit card company, but I don’t like being in debt.

  4.  I am a Filipino, but I’m not a Catholic.

  3.  I live in Utah, but I’m not a Mormon.

  2.  I like George Carlin, but I’m not an atheist.

  1.  I’m a Christian and I don’t like dirty words, but I don’t take any bullsh!t  bs from anyone, even from the president.

     I’ve come across this poem about 11 years ago.  I’m pretty sure many of you have read it, and I hope you liked it as I did.  I highlighted the lines about the risks that I took when I decided to create this blog.

RISK
Author unknown

To laugh is to risk appearing the fool
To weep is to risk appearing sentimental
To reach out to others is to risk involvement
To expose your feelings is to risk exposing your true self
To place your ideas, your dreams before a crowd is to risk their loss
To love is to risk not being loved in return
To live is to risk dying
To hope is to risk despair
To try is to risk failure
But risks must be taken,
because the greatest hazard in life is to do nothing.
The person who risks nothing, does nothing, has nothing,
and is nothing.
They may avoid suffering and sorrow,
but they cannot learn, feel, change, grow, love, live.
Chained by their attitudes, they are slaves,
they forfeited their freedom.
Only the person who risks can be free

   You see my fellow bloggers, WE ARE FREE!

Dear daughter,
 

     Ideally, your mom or I should read to you everyday, not let you watch The Little Mermaid for the umpteenth time.  We know that you’re just a kid and watching the Wiggles and Dora every morning is not particularly bad for you.  But when you say “I’m loving it” every time you see the McDonalds logo and “You’re fired!” every time you see Donald Trump, maybe where letting you watch too much tv. 

     But I’m not too worried about it.  I also started late in picking up reading as one of my hobbies.  I started with comic strips from the newspaper my dad used to read religiously every morning.  I also stumbled upon a comic version of, you won’t believe this, the Bible!  I loved reading the stories about Samson and Delilah (Back then, I wished I had his strength.  Today, I just wish my hair would grow like his), about Joseph and his not so good brothers and tons of other fascinating stories.  And of course don’t forget to read about that Man who did some wonderful things like healing the sick, walking on water and feeding five thousand people with only five loaves of bread and two fishes!  Wow, I wish I had this kind of power when we celebrated your first birthday and more than one hundred family and friends attended.  Anyway, pretty amazing stuff eh?  Here’s another one, He died on the cross to save you, your mom and me! (Among other people of course).  Well, if you’re still not impressed, I don’t know what will. 

     Then during high school I ventured into the sports section of the newspapers where I clipped pictures and stories about my favorite basketball team.  There was also a very cool trivia section called “Did you know that?”.  I also read some really interesting novels like The Little Prince, Jonathan Livingston Seagull and the works of Dr. Jose Rizal like “Noli Me Tangere” and “El Filibusterismo”.  During college, I eventually got around to reading the actual news from the newspapers, yay.  This is pretty useful knowledge you know, its good to be aware of the things happening around you.

     I won’t list all the books I read cause people reading this blog will start yawning.  But here are some books that I wish you would read (besides the Bible of course) when you grow up.  Seven Habits of Highly Effective people by S. Covey, Your Money or Your Life by Joe Dominguez and Vicki Robin,  Write It Down, Make It Happen by H. Klauser, Successful Intelligence by R. Sternberg and last but not the least, the book written by my dad, your “lolo”.

    & nbsp; I know when you read this you will be debating with yourself if your dad is cool or geeky.  Don’t worry, I won’t be mad at you whichever you choose, as long as you promise me that you will read tons of books.  After that, I suggest that you read some more.

Sincerely, 

Your Dad

"I took a speed reading course and read 'War and Peace' in twenty minutes.  It involves Russia."

    & nbsp;   &n bsp;   &nb sp;   &nbs p;     ;         & nbsp;   &n bsp;   &nb sp;   &nbs p;  Woody Allen (1935 - )

Dear daughter,

     I know your only 2 years old and you couldn't even read this.  But we don't know when I will go so I want to give some advice before that time comes.  I adhere to all of them, well ok most of them, so I hope you do too.

Spend more time reading than wa tching tv.

Do not date boys whose IQ is much lower than yours.  Believe me there are even some of them out there who don’t even know what IQ means. 

Never get a tattoo.  Women with tattoos usually have low self-esteem.  I’m not going to talk about men with tattoos because I don’t want to get hurt.

Learn how to cook.  Or marry a millionaire.

When you start earning money, try to save as much as possible.  You never know when I’ll borrow some from you for hair transplant.

Do not eat fast food more than twice a week.  Unless you want to weigh more than 300 lbs.

Do not compare yourself to others, only to your previous self.

Do not drink too much coffee, you do not have mutant powers like your dad.

Learn to be really, really good at Scrabble.  It’s a nice feeling to know that you can beat most people at the game, even the president.

Try not to borrow money from anyone, especially from credit card companies.

Do not argue with your mother.  You cannot win.  I repeat, you cannot win.

Never buy a timeshare.

Never buy a vacuum cleaner that costs 4 figures.

If you get addicted easily, do not start a blog.

Not all advice are good, unless it’s coming from the Bible.

Not all jokes are funny, unless it’s coming from me.

Sincerely,

Your Dad